Shaken By Doubt?

What do you do when ‘always believe in yourself’ begins to crumble? Ask: What is it that you’re doubting. That seems to me, to be the question. There is a difference between believing in your beliefs, and believing in your Self, so let’s look at it.

After six decades, it seems that I still have an evolving belief system. The spiritual ideal holding that changing picture together would be a childhood wish for a clean heart and right spirit. I suspect that’s the case for a lot of us… remembering ourselves as children, we did have a desire to do right and feel clean inside… clean and free. Continue reading

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Divided We Stand, Together We Rise

The sins of Babylon have reached to heaven… it’s kind of a contest as to which country in the world is the worst, but the US wins the Babylon crown hands down. We live here, but we’re not the ones pulling the strings. We are the ones in a daze, waking up and wondering… how did this happen? We thought we were in the land of the free… land of opportunity! And here we are… enslaved!

I just heard somebody say, “The game is chess and we’re playing checkers.” I had to smile at that, because it’s an interesting picture of our situation. Divide and conquer has worked for oh so long that it seems to be what humans are meant to do: be separate, adversarial, frightened, poor in spirit, self-centered, and always right. The wrongs that ‘right’ people do to each other, just as a matter of course, just because they want to or can; it can make you heartsick if you let it. Continue reading

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Womanhood Revisited

Sometimes we don’t really know how the collective human experience has affected our lives until something hits a mark, and we respond emotionally. The angry don’t know they’re angry, the stressed don’t know they’re stressed, the fearful don’t know they’re fearful, the resentful don’t know they’re resentful. It can be deep inside… stuff we don’t look at and try to resolve because we experience it as normal or necessary.

These emotions or states of mind can become so embedded that if we find ourselves in a safe, non-assaultive, peaceful, loving environment, we get uneasy… like we’re losing our edge. All of a sudden there’s no storm and the sea is calm… and we wonder what to do. “Isn’t there something lurking under the surface that I need to be aware of… something I need to tense up against?” Continue reading

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Time to Flush the Mind

The gravity of the situation… we hear a lot about that. In our souls gravity is not a low-vibe thing: it’s a feeling room. Even if I had the opportunity to hang with the high-vibe folks and talk about how simple the profound is and how profound the simple, I wouldn’t make a life out of it. Day-to-day life is friction. It’s where the rubber meets the road. It’s where our growth comes from.

There is no escaping our feet on the earth life, with sons and daughters and loved ones and strangers who go through things. And it’s not just them… we go through it with them, with our own stuff mixed in. Human beings go through it. Sometimes it’ll send you to your bed to curl up and pull up the covers, and shed a few ‘this stuff’s heavy’ tears. Continue reading

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End-Time Stories

The Internet is full of articles and videos speculating that it’s the end for us. Here’s the essence of the latest one I read: the people pulling the strings of the US Government want war, they want to do a first-strike on Russia with nukes, they’re insane enough to think they can win and they just may do it. This is the belief of the writer.

The nukes possibility is but one scenario offered: one among many… some far fetched, some logical outcomes of current political trends, some anticipations of earth changes. It seems a lot of observers are taking action in whichever way will negate the scenario that they believe, others are responding to the time by changing themselves, still others are determined to not look. Continue reading

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Each Small Candle Lights a Corner of the Dark

Between painful discomfort with self and self-love is love of truth. Some may say… let go, let go, let go of the discomfort… but you know, I’m kind of an owl person: I like to go into the ‘dark’… maybe if we really can see how things come apart, we can understand how to restore ourselves on a higher level: higher because there is new information digested.

I want to look at what ‘let go’ means, as attempting to let go of what you haven’t understood and dealt with truthfully is pretty much self deceit… it remains as is, unlit and still in control. Continue reading

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Love Us Through

It was a year ago, about right now, that I started the ‘diagnosis’ journey. I’m talking about breast cancer. I didn’t like thinking, believing or saying, “I have cancer”, probably because I never felt like I ‘had’ cancer. Yes, there were a couple of locations where cancerous cells had accumulated into a mass in the breast tissue, but that was it. So I told friends and family that I was going to have to figure out what to do about a breast cancer diagnosis.

Initially the doctors said they had located one lump, but my friend Soren said there are two. Sure enough, the MRI agreed with him… there were two. That knowledge sent me on quite a journey, and I kept quiet about it, for the most part, except with family and friends. Then a few months ago I talked about it in a blog post, and that step took a bit of courage, I must admit. Continue reading

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